Drugs

I suppose I am a bit hypocritical about my stance on drugs. I don't like a lot of prescription drugs when they do not treat the deeper problem (like anxiety or depression medicine - why are you depressed. treat that). And I don't like "recreational" drugs. Maybe the Regan administration had a strong influence on me, or maybe it was watching other people do drugs. I believe that they can lead to other things (pot to heavier things) and they can have a negative effect on your life. Make your paranoid, withdrawn, hang out with shady people... Granted, a lot of people don't hang out with shady people and can still be productive etc.. But, this is another debate that can never be settled. If I ask people who have done drugs they are biased in one direction, and people who have never done drugs are biased in another. Oddly enough some people who have smoked pot give me varying responses. I suppose it depends on the individual.

Here's the hypocritical part. On occasion, I like to have a drink. It is a drug, it can be addicting, it can lead to other habits, and it is mind altering. For similar reasons to why I am hating being sick - that my body is behaving oddly and I can't control it, that I do not know why I feel the way I do - I like to have a drink. I like to feel a little dizzy and floaty and relaxed and less in control. Which.. is odd since that is why I hate being sick! I suppose since I chose to have the drink I am somewhat in control? Granted, I have never been so drunk I have lost so much control that I've gotten sick or lost consciousness or woken up with a stranger or not been able to remember what happened.

But, I don't think those things happen when you smoke pot. No one smokes a few and wakes up with a stranger, or winds up puking... Maybe I don't like it because you must smoke it? But, there are brownies.... I'm very straight edged and law abiding, possibly the law scares me off. And the negative aura that surrounds it. Negative from society's perspective.

Other drugs, definitely not. With pot you still have control (or at least with only a little?). I can have one drink and still think fairly clearly and know it will wear off shortly and know that although I may act a little silly or giggle too much or talk too much, I'm not going to end up doing something I may regret. Well, probably not.

I don't understand the why. I suppose some people like the way they feel.. But, whatever emotion or feeling you are looking for, there are other less dangerous legal ways of feeling that (except the feeling of being attacked by giant spiders or whatever). In other words, if you need to relax, try yoga.

Also hypocritically, if a doctor prescribes for me the same drug that others use recreationally, I have no problem taking it. Possibly this goes back to the fact that now its legal, and if its prescribed and I'm taking it for pain, there is a different connotation than someone scoring morphine to get their kicks. (note, I haven't tried morphine) Yes, that is what the drug actually exists for, but I think in some geeky way I think its cool. Like "wee, I'm getting some drug, and its legal!".

Hm, is this like a virgin wondering what all the noise about sex is? "Why are peopled all crazy about this sex thing? Why don't they just take a walk and hold hands, or read a good book?" Maybe, but I like to put my thoughts down, even if you plotted this out and it looked like some yarn someone dropped on the floor, its still good to write it out.